Truce between Head and Heart

When too much has built up: little snowflakes of incidents and occurrences have built up to form a cold snowball effect. Too much has been said. Too much has been done. There’s no means of arranging it in a neat chronological order. No index to indicate the chapters. I couldn’t even begin to imagine where to start and I have no idea where I’ll possibly finish. Anthills of feelings were played around. Mountains of emotions swirled in each’s head. The life story of each, you know nothing about. Perhaps their outward appearance, but the pearl inside the shell you know not from a bar of soap. So many things are remembered, but so many forgotten. Missing pieces. Point of views differ – each spectator’s view sitting in the Coliseum is different. You could not, you would not, know the frustration and irritation I felt. The dismaying black hole which has swallowed me if from a completely different universe. A supernova of the happiness I once felt diminished and destroyed – I have no way of remembering the light without the darkness. I don't trust people. I don't trust you.So many things still run through my head and prey on my sleepless nights. No matter how much you insist, how much you desire the knowledge to know, it will not help you in the least. For once, perhaps, my head and “heart” agree - I can’t tell you. You would not understand